PFR Notes January 22, 2010

By this time, most who made a New Year Resolution and got started, are just about stopped. The gyms are returning to normal and seem as quiet as a library. No one is talking about resolutions, because that would be an unwelcomed conversation. It’s fun to talk about all the things you are going to do, no so much when the conversation is about all the things you failed to do.

Even though the Personal Freedom Revolution had no end goal in mind, so there is nothing to fall short of, other than falling short of simply doing it, still there is drop off. The drop off is greater than just the check offs on the challenge. The drop off is on the intensity to which those who are still in there are really doing it.

What do I mean by that? Well, we either are not saying the affirmations or we are saying them with less energy. Maybe we are hitting the grateful list in the morning, but missing it at night. More likely, you skip in the morning and say I’ll do it tonight, but then you might forget to say them at night and will make up for it in the morning. You are not looking at every choice and asking yourself what should I do to be my personal best. The Reverse Tool sounded great the day you read about it, but when is the last time you used it?

You figure it is okay, because you are still watching the videos, listening to the Podcasts and reading the notes. It is okay, because you are learning a lot and you get it. In fact you are having tons of light bulb moments. So let me ask you a question, if you watch the videos, listen to the Podcasts, read the material on how to workout, and you understand it all, and you never workout, or workout sporadically, are you going to get into shape? Never mind, I figured that one out on my own.

Listen, do you really want this year to be different? If you do, then you have to dig inside yourself. It is in the doing that change is created. The entire Revolution Program is a Boot Camp to get you ready to make commitments. I know it can seem pointless at times, boring, or the blocks are hard to get through, but you need to dig inside yourself.

How are you going to use the Commitment Tool and create the changes you want, if you cannot keep with this commitment now? I don’t care how well you think you are doing, do better. That sounds harsh, but that is how it is. If you want to create real change, dig inside yourself and push, push and push and make that commitment. I know you can do it, I know you have it in you. I know that you really want to break free of the prisons of not living the life you want. The freedom you want takes you pushing harder. You have the power inside of you, you have to be committed and you have to dig in.

Dig in and it might hurt a little, but you will feel better than ever. Dig in and soon we will make commitments and they will seem like taking a walk on a sunny day. You will smile at how easy it is to create the changes you want, once you learn how to make a commitment.

So…DIG IN!

PFR Notes January 21, 2010

Think about it, there is always a reason why you can’t do something, why you are doing something and why things are the way they are. We all know that there is never enough time, don’t we. Therefore, not having time is always a reason why we can’t do this or that. We are so good at the reasons that we think that they are reality.

We have been working to achieve change this year through resolving to be our personal best. That means at every fork in the road where there is a decision, you are choosing to make the choice that will lead towards life improvement. We have discussed many of the reasons why you do not take the better road, that there are literally blocks that barricade that choice. The block of excuses is one that we build consciously.

We say, I can’t do it because of, I did it because of, it is that way because of. In truth the only reason it is because of is…you. In order to truly be at your best, I want you to make another resolution today, the resolution of “No Excuses.” You have to be resolved to not give energy to a reason why you cannot be your personal best.

Be resolved, “No Excuses”, and truly be your personal best.

PFR Notes January 20, 2010

As we are working on being resolved to be our personal best, we are discovering it is not as easy as it sounds. Regardless of knowing what we want, or what we should do, we still often make the wrong or no choice to move in the direction that is best. We are working at not concentrating on what the formula of success is, but how to get past our blocks.

A block that we are all aware of is FEAR. We know that fear stops us from moving forward and paralyzes us from forward motion. We are also aware that a lot of fear is self induced and created by what we are thinking. It is almost as if we could just get a push, so that we could just move, we would discover that the fear isn’t real.

With that in mind, to show you that fear is just something that you are creating, many self help weekend experiences include walking on hot coals, or swinging on a trapeze. The experience shows you that you think in your mind that you are going to get burned, but if you stop thinking about it and move forward you do not. If you let go and leap and swing on that trapeze you will get caught, or you will drop into a net, all will be okay if you let go of the fear.

That might be a good analogy for many types of fears. The bill collector is better to face than run etc. However, in life, you do get burned, and there is not always someone there to catch you, or a net to fall into safety. There are real things out there that could and can hurt you. It is also reasonable to not want them or to be fearful of them.

The excellence of life is not the absence of fear, but the ability not to let fear paralyze us. Instead of walking on coals to not get burned, supposed they burned you. What would that mean? Would that fact that there is pain mean that you cannot heal? I think it is as important to realize that there is pain and failure in life, but even still, you will be okay. To say that there is nothing in life to fear, is simply not realistic.

What is important to realize is, that regardless of the outcome to which we can fear, we will heal. Getting into a relationship is a prime example. The things you fear about a relationship are real, and unlike the coals that you walk on that do not burn, these coals do burn. You can get hurt and disappointed in relationship, and that is okay. You will heal and the possible gain is always worth more than the pain.

Moving forward is not always with the absence of fear, it is with the courage to move forward regardless of the fear. How do you do that? A soldier in battle with live ammunition being fired is not absent of fear, the mission and purpose of the battle is more important than the fear creating the will to move forward, regardless of fear.

Your mission and purpose in life, what you want, has to be more important to you than the fear. Then the fear becomes background to moving forward. You don’t always have to feel that there is nothing to fear, but what you need to develop is a greater desire for the possible result, than the possibility of the negative outcome. Realize also, that even the negative outcome, as real and fearful as it is, you will heal. So if you get burned on the coals, it is worth it if you are going after what you want in life.

Developing a deep sense of desire and fear will not block you from your wants.

PFR Notes January 19, 2010

Today we listened to an Interview with Terry Moore. What an inspiration of change.

The biggest block to creating change, is ourselves. It is what we believe is or is not possible that defines our life and the choices and actions we take. When we started this journey together, I called it a revolution. I explained that it was not a revolution against any outside identity. I explained it was a revolution against ourselves. Against the thinking that created results in our life we did not want.

I discussed that if you really want to be free, freedom starts with how you are thinking. Break free of the prison you have created for yourself by thinking what you cannot do. You can truly change your life at any moment, but the change you are looking for comes from within. Be the change you want in your life.

I hope hearing Terry Moore’s story motivated you to dig inside yourself, to push further and believe. You can do this, you can create change. Do the affirmations with enthusiasm. Believe in you, dig inside yourself and push past your blocks and make choices that result in you being your best.

Day by day we are getting better. Don’t worry about the big picture, the actions you take today will add up to huge changes, take them every day.

You can create change, it is never too late.

Today is the first day of your life. How do you want to start writing that story?

It took a lot of courage for Terry to share, sharing is part of the healing process. If you are in PFR share in the comments, if you are not, share in the blogs, or do both.

I would like you to share one self limiting belief you have held on to and declare that you are letting it go. State one action you are going to take in the opposite direction that belief has driven you in.

By sharing a belief that has held you back that you are breaking free of, other people will say, I thought that too. Let’s follow Terry out of prison, no, not the prison he served time in. That prison was short term compared to the prison he lived in his mind. Today, he is living as a free man, not because he is out of prison, because he is free in his mind to pursue the life he wants.

I am excited to read your prison break stories…this is exciting stuff.

Start your comment with, “I am breaking out of the prison I have lived in by thinking _____________. I now believe I can _____________. I am taking the following one step _____________ in my new free world.

Share as long a prison break story as you want, we love escape movies. Let’s consider this “The Great Escape”

See you on the other side …

PFR Notes January 18, 2010

Doesn’t it seem we get into the same situations in life over and over again?

Think about your weight and diet, is there a pattern?
Think about your relationships, is there a pattern?
Think about your finances, is there a pattern?
Think about your addictions, is there a pattern?
Your moods, fights, being late, organization and more…pattern – pattern – pattern.

You often wonder to yourself, “Why does this keep happening?” You promise yourself over and over that you will change this or that, “That this time it will be different.” Or, “That you will never do x again.” You even know what you should do different. Yet, you still do it. You do it over and over and you know better and you want better. Still, you do it and do it and repeat it.

Why do you repeat doing what you know you should not? The reason is because change is not just about recognizing what you are doing wrong or wanting better. Here is a strange concept, change is not even about changing what it is you want to change. Change often requires understanding what drives you to that behavior. You see the circumstances that you want to change are really symptoms. They are symptoms of a pattern of thinking that creates the action that causes the circumstance to which you want change. In reality, the thing that you really want to change is not the symptom, but the cause. Until you change the cause, the symptom will always return.

The cause to every part of your life that you want to change, is how you are thinking. Until you change the thinking, you will think yourself back into the same circumstance. Changing the thinking is not as easy as all that, many of the areas that we want to change the thinking that drives or behavior is caused by deep issues within us. Uncovering those wounds and healing them so that we can change behavior is serious work.

There are many methods that allow us to create change at a cause level. For right now, recognize and forgive yourself. You are not all those names you called yourself for the things you have done this or that over and over, you just didn’t understand the cause. We will continue to look at the causes, the blocks and how to create change with correctional thinking.

You are really very brave and you are doing great. Read today’s Monday Inspiration in the article section: http://toolstolife.com/articles/

Continue with your routine and be proud of yourself…I am proud of you!

PFR Notes January 17, 2010

We all have a back story. Back stories are the episodes of our life from yesterday. There are two different types of back stories, the ones that have created emotional holes, and the ones that we just get stuck thinking about. The emotional holes we will discuss tomorrow. Today, we talk about the drama you live in by what you focus on.

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PFR Notes January 16, 2010

I know we are resolved to being our personal best, even still, we love to fail. Isn’t that strange that we love to fail? Strange as it might sound, it is very true. When we fail we get to feel bad. Not only do we get to feel bad, we get to tell ourselves how bad we are. We go further and further into negative self talk and we can convince ourselves that we are just failures in this particular area of life. We get so convinced that we arrive at, “What’s the point?”

Even though I used a question mark, it is really not a question when we say, “What’s the point.” It is really a statement that why even try, we are failures. As we get to feel worse and worse and feel like that, what do we do? We continue in the negative behavior. In truth, it is not that we love to fail, or that we love to feel bad, the truth is we like the negative behavior. Being our personal best means making different choices. Even though our old choices are choices that are not good for us, they are the choices we are used to.

It can feel very uncomfortable to create new behavior. It can even feel strange as things get better. There is a exposed feeling of not being safe in positive circumstances. “When will it end?” We will discuss this further soon, but you run for cover and comfort in your old behavior. However you don’t want to make a open move, so if you fail it is not your fault, you are just a failure.

That is the addict in you. The person addicted to what was who wants you to feel that way. The first thing you need to do is accept that you will not be perfect. You will make mistakes and you will not always be your personal best. We are not trying to become critical of ourselves or judgmental and drive ourselves to feeling like a failure by setting unrealistic expectations on ourselves.

Here is the ironic logic, in order to be our personal best, we have to accept that we are not always our personal best, and that is okay.

State Out Loud: “I forgive myself and accept myself as I am.” Three (3) times.

Now go out there and make mistakes, but be your personal best!

PFR Notes January 15, 2010

While trying to be our “Personal Best,” we run into all sorts of obstacles. In order to improve our life, it is not about learning what we need to do, it is more important to remove the obstacles that stand in front of us from doing what we already know we should do. It is very difficult to do our personal best when these obstacles are blocking us. We have been working day by day not looking for those magic answers to fix our lives. We have been working on a very simple concept, at every choice, choose to do your personal best and your life will get better every day as you do. We can do this with no end goal in mind, and we can appreciate our lives as they are and be happy. Really fantastic stuff!

One huge obstacle is the definitions you give yourself. When you have predetermined definitions of yourself, then at points where you have choices, you don’t see choices, you only see the one way of being. Basically you only see one road. Only seeing one road only, you always continue down the same road. What this means is that there is no way for you to be a different way. There is no option to be your personal best, you are being who you are. That famous,, “That’s who I am” way of thinking.

It is a card you can use for any situation. It explains everything and excuses everything. It requires no effort to be better. “Sorry honey that I am late, you know how I am, I am always late.” The definition, “I am a late person.”

I have a sweet tooth, I get angry fast, I am moody, I am not a morning person, I can’t remember names, I am not good with money, I lose track of time, I am disorganized and endless other definitions. These definitions are roads with no exits, no forks where you can choose to go a different direction. They make you who you are. There is no definition of you, other than the definition you give yourself. All these definitions only have as much power as you give them. Here is the truth, you can change anyone of these things. When motivated, you can always do different, so it is not who you are, it is really who you are choosing to be. You simple have never dug inside yourself and gotten motivated to change the road you are traveling on. All roads lead to a destination, and unfortunately the self limiting definitions we give ourselves always lead to the same results.

If we want to get to new results, we have to create new roads to travel on. We have to change the definitions that we create. We have to remove the no choice of, “that’s who I am” to a choice of, “I can be who I choose to be.” Only then can we exercise our power of choice, and only then can we truly make a choice to be our personal best.

Only then can you call this a revolution. A revolution is all about choosing a different road.

Start paving new roads today…

Don’t forget, ask your questions so we can address them in a up and coming video during the PFR.

Yes. It is true, PFR will only be available for a limited time.

PFR Notes January 14, 2010

When we were kids, one of the first lessons we were taught about being on our own was, “Don’t speak to strangers.” Even more was, “Don’t take candy from strangers.” When we were kids, that was a strange concept. After all, we liked and wanted candy. How could taking candy from anyone be bad? We learned that it was not the candy that was the issue, but what the intentions of the person offering us the candy were.

Yes, what seems like a tempting treat can turn out to have a negative effect. The candy man lives inside us all, waiting for what we think are treats, only to kidnap us and take us to a state of existence that we do not want. Why does a stranger offer candy to children, because the stranger knows that is what a child likes and wants. Even though candy is what we might want as a child, regardless of the stranger, candy might not be that good for us, and too much of it certainly gives us a belly ache.

The candy man that lives inside you, also knows what you want. He knows you want to sleep longer, skip the gym, eat poorly, spend money, drink, and more. The candy man also want to kidnap you and take you away from your goals. So the candy man will seduce you with these treats. The seducing voice will tell you, “You deserve it,” or “Just this once is okay,” or, “You have been so good, you deserve a reward.”

Don’t get in that van, don’t get taken away from your goals. Don’t get seduced by candy. These things are not rewards, the reward is achieving and living with your goals. It is a reward to live with a better body, financial security and more. The reward is not getting in the van.

To be your personal best, you have to not take candy from strangers.

Keep with your affirmations and don’t get seduced …

PFR Notes January 13, 2010

As simple as that sounds, being our personal best is not as easy as it sounds no matter how resolved we are to do so. We run up against many obstacles. One issue we have is that many of the choices we make are hardwired into our behavioral pattern. We make these choices without attaching conscious thought, but as an automatic response that we have been repeating over and over again. These automatic responses take effort to catch, slow down, and to start making different choices.

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